dear, whoever reads this anymore

I have found myself in a predicament, yet again, as always, in writing and updating this blog. Part of me continuously wants to strive and become a better writer, but I’m not necessarily sure if I have it in me. Maybe being a student with my head barely keeping above water does not help, but I can’t find the time to post. Lately, my mind has been filled with so many things. I can’t help but feel like I’m doing enough, yet I feel like I’m too much. I can’t get my mind off of the work I need to do. I can’t help but feel guilty over things that I have no control over what so ever. I’m lost, but I also have my life planned out for the next three years, which is a lot more than the average college senior, but I still feel so, so lost. I’m not even sure how to fully express myself anymore. Everything is the luck of the draw and like… I feel like I can only push my luck so far. In regards to grad school, this is all I ever here. It doesn’t matter if you’re a particularly good or bad writer or student, it all comes down to luck.

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